Every person dreams of true love and an ideal partner. However, as a rule, when choosing a potential partner, we focus on the type that seems most attractive to us. But there are other factors that determine potential compatibility with a person. The theory of evaluating a partner suggests that we look at the person we like from several perspectives at once.
Four “lenses” through which we can look at a potential partner and see if he or she is your person:
1. “General Perspective”
From this perspective, we assess not only potential relationship partners, but people in general. First of all, we pay attention to his appearance and whether or not he meets the requirements that religion and culture dictate to us.
2. The “perceptual lens.”
At this point we turn to our own experience-we analyze a potential partner through the lens of our own relationship requirements. Assessing from this perspective, we determine how comfortable we can be with the person.
3. “Character Perspective.”
This perspective applies selectively to certain partners based on their characteristics. It includes ideals and preferences for certain traits of a potential partner.
4. “Targeting Lens.”
This perspective is specific to each relationship. At this point, we determine if the potential partner will lead us to the desired outcome.
By evaluating a potential partner from these four perspectives, we can see how compatible we are and whether it is worth trying to build a future with that person.
Of course, choosing the perfect partner is as much an art as it is a science. However, scientists have studied many aspects of relationships and have derived a number of patterns that can help in choosing a partner.
For example, studies show that the most successful relationships have people whose values and interests coincide. Therefore, when choosing a partner, you should pay attention to common interests and values.
It is also important to consider that every person has his or her strengths and weaknesses. Therefore, when choosing a partner, you should accept him or her for who he or she is and not try to change him or her.
In addition, it is important to consider that relationships require effort and work. Therefore, when choosing a partner, you should pay attention to his or her willingness to work on the relationship and develop a life together.
It is important to understand that there is no perfect partner. However, when choosing a partner, you should be guided not only by external qualities, but also by internal character traits, interests and values.