Every mother strives to raise her child in the best way possible. Sometimes, however, a mother’s care crosses the line and becomes toxic. A toxic mother is a mother who does not know how to show love and care for her child, but instead inflicts emotional harm on her child. This behavior can lead to serious psychological problems in her daughters, who will have difficulty interacting with others and in relationships.
The neglectful mother
This type of mother ignores her daughter’s accomplishments. She does not recognize her accomplishments and criticizes them harshly. A girl who grows up in such a family often becomes insecure and craves love and recognition. This can lead to her becoming dependent on others and unable to make decisions for herself.
The controlling mother
This type of mother does not recognize her daughter’s right to autonomy. She dominates all areas of interaction and instills in her daughter feelings of helplessness and insecurity. Such a mother often justifies her position with a desire for the “good” for the child. As a result, the daughter may become insecure about her abilities and feelings, as well as convinced of her inadequacy.
The Inaccessible Mother
This type of mother shows no emotion toward her daughter. She may not hug or comfort, is not receptive to tears and complaints, and is incapable of trusting communication. A girl raised in such a family may suffer from emotional hunger and need warmth and affection.
This type of mother periodically appears in different roles for the daughter. She may be angry and aggressive today, emotionally unavailable tomorrow, and hyperprotective and loving a couple of days later. Because of this, the daughter cannot determine which interaction with her mother will be the right one and not be traumatic. This behavior can cause the girl to experience constant stress and anxiety.
This type of mother often occurs on the background of alcoholism, illness of the mother or the presence of many siblings. The eldest daughter in such a family becomes the guardian of her mother. Such mothers may love their daughters, but cannot influence their feelings. As a result, the daughter may feel lonely and unwanted.
How do you overcome a mother’s toxic influence?
– You don’t have to blame yourself for your mother’s behavior. Remember that it is her problem, not yours.
– Try to set boundaries in your relationship with your mother. Don’t let her interfere in your life and make decisions for you.
– Talk to other people who can support you and help you overcome difficulties.
– See a therapist who can help you learn to manage your emotions and deal with your feelings.
A mother’s toxic influence can be very detrimental to her daughter’s mental health. However, understanding what type of mother you have will help you recognize the toxic influence and learn how to manage the painful interaction.