Why are more and more couples sleeping in separate beds: good or bad?

Sleep is one of the most important functions of our body. It helps us recover from a long day, strengthens our immune system and improves our mood. But what if you can’t get a good night’s sleep with your partner? In recent years, more and more couples are choosing to sleep in separate beds or even rooms to improve the quality of their sleep. In this article, we’ll look at the pros and cons of this approach.

Why do couples sleep in separate beds?

According to a Sleep Foundation survey of 1,250 adults in the United States, 1.4% of respondents have slept separately from their partners for a year or more. More than half (52.9%) said sleeping alone improved their sleep quality. However, 25.7% of respondents who had experimented with sleeping separately went back to sharing a bed with their partner, which increased their sleep duration.

According to a New York Times survey of 2,200 American adults, one in five couples now sleep in separate bedrooms at least part of the time. Reasons can vary, including scheduling conflicts, need for personal space, nightly scrolling of thoughts and snoring.

Pros and cons of separate sleeping arrangements


1. Improved quality of sleep. As mentioned, more than half of respondents to the Sleep Foundation survey said that sleeping alone improved their quality of sleep.

2. Less anxiety. When you sleep alone, you can sleep more soundly without worrying that your partner might disturb your sleep.

3. more personal space. If you feel you lack personal space, then sleeping separately may be a good solution for you.

4. Reduced conflict. If you and your partner often have conflicts over sleep, sleeping apart can help reduce them.


1. Decreased intimacy. If you and your partner sleep separately, it can lead to less physical contact and less intimacy.

2. Deterioration of sleep quality. A study of 12 healthy heterosexual couples found that when couples slept together, they slept 10 percent longer than in rapid eye movement (REM) mode.

3. Feeling lonely. Sleeping separately can lead to feelings of loneliness and estrangement from one’s partner.

4. Communication problems. If you and your partner sleep separately, it can lead to a decrease in the amount of time you spend together.

What to do?

As we can see, there are both pros and cons to sleeping apart. So when it comes to sleep separation, do what works best for you, your partner and your relationship. It clearly works for some people and not others, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer, just like with sleep.

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